Real Life Stories
THE CASE OF RYAN
Ryan, a successful SVO GCD of Corporate and Public Affairs at an internationally known public relations and marketing firm, had successfully created and led many campaigns for his company. However, he had gotten negative feedback from his CEO and told that if he wanted to keep his job, he had to change his attitude. Several people on his team, had complained that his style of leadership was very hard driven and intense, so much so, that his attitude of needing to win at all costs, made him difficult to work with and was alienating his team.
In speaking with him, it became clear that he feared failing and that this fear was driving his intense interactions with others. He lacked the people skills, which called for more inclusivity, empathy and being able to hear others; important skills needed to be a great leader, in addition to the drive and vision he already possessed. As we spoke, he rationally understood that he needed to shift his style, but he could not grasp from within himself how to do so.
Coaching him with Eidetic Imagery, allowed him to see and to viscerally experience from within his own self, what was impeding him and to uncover his own authentic abilities to successfully lead his team.
1. Ryan, take a moment, close your eyes and see an image in your mind’s eye that you are at work with your usual intensity.
“I immediately see an image of a cinder block in my mind’s eye. I see the that the cinder block is hard, fixed, heavy and cold. It is self-contained and impenetrable. Wow, this is exactly how I feel while working on a project with my team. I am impenetrable. I see that I don’t support, nor provide foundation to my team, nor let them support me. The brick is a metaphor for my inaccessibility, fixity and intensity. I am closed off and difficult to access. I have a hard edge and a hard line.”
2. Ok. Now see through the eyes of your team members, they see you. What do they see?
“They see someone who excels in purpose but, is rigid.”
3. How do they feel as they see you?
“Respectful, but also with a guard up, scared, distant. I realize that I don’t let them contribute their ideas to me. I am tough and closed. A realization is now coming over me that I am so obsessed and driven, so that people will love me. This feels sad. I see that I have to win to be loved. I am afraid that if I fail I won’t be loved.”
4. Now think of someone who was a successful leader who had no fear of being loved.
“I see someone I once worked with who did not work for love. Actually, he emanated good energy and love to others. He was confident. He had nothing to prove and he achieved a lot. People loved him.”
5. Now keep this leader in your mind. Doing so, will impact your own energy in some way. See yourself at work with him in mind. Let the image unfold on its own.
“When I keep that person in mind and I see me at work, I feel relaxed and still and very thoughtful and on point but, more friendly, open, and warm.”
6. Ok. How does that feel to you?
“Feels like I can take a breath as opposed to holding my breath.”
7. See yourself working in that relaxed and on point manner. What do you see?
“I am more fluid and open, just as my CEO asked me to be. It feels more natural, as opposed to tense and hyper focused, which is how I always am. This feels better.”
8. Now, see through the eyes of your team, they see you as you keep this successful leader in mind.
“They see someone who is happier, accepting and flexible.”
9. How do they feel as they see that in you?
“Empowered. This is crazy, as I shift, I automatically empower them.
10. Now how do you feel seeing that they are empowered?
“I feel like a teacher, a successful teacher. I am truly capable of being more open and still working to win. This feels really good. I feel better being focused on helping the others than just focusing on my own success. I see if I keep this leader in my mind, a kind of wisdom downloads within me about how to lead others making me more connected and even more effective at work.”
In the above coaching session using the Eidetic Imagery tools, the solutions, shifts and realizations came from within Ryan himself. The eidetic image opens doors within one’s mind where hidden solutions and personal powers are stored.